Golden State Juventus take it easy on Frosinone by only beating them 2-0 - all Frosinone mothers are grateful. Napoli play another great game that has all their supporters wondering “what the hell happened against Sampdoria?” Speaking of Sampdoria, the fortress of Genoa is breached by Inter, who slowly but surely are contributing the rise in cardiac attacks in Milan. Fiorentina are still super young and getting sexier as the say to the rest of the Serie A “You see? It’s not that hard” with a 3-0 waxing of the Great Wall of SPAL. Gervinho has Parma going HAM against Cagliari, Milan doing their best to keep pace with Roma, and Roma? We got problems.
A dark cloud hangs over and exciting weekend for all CurvAmericans, following the tragedy of Genoa’s bridge collapse. Two games are postponed and a moment of silence is observed before all Serie A fixtures. Nevertheless, Serie A is back and on ESPN, hopefully putting an end to shady Reddit streams nationwide. Cristiano Ronaldo’s much anticipated Juve debut is almost spoiled by the Geriatric Donkeys. Napoli and OTFR go toe-to-toe in Week one’s Game of the Week. Roma get a moment of brilliance to put them past their former teammates in Torino. And, finally, Inter come out flat and give the season its first big upset.
Week 19! Napoli and Juventus take 3 points from some Serie A catfish, while Inter and Roma draw and slip, slip, slip-a-delphia further from the top 2. Milan throws in a last minute submittal for “Ugliest Draw of The Year” against Fiorentina. Udinese stay hot and show the Serie A that for the last 5 weeks a Zebra can change its stripes. Sampdoria rip SPAL for 3 points and keep the feces out of the bed for the last match of 2017. And, finally, Benevento show they are not above beating up old man Chievo to get their first win in Serie A history and have a story to tell everyone in Serie B next season.
The Top of the Table forgets how to play soccer this week and drop a combined 13 points. The Derby d’Italia results in a disappointing 0-0 draw and Tim Kraus from Serpents of Madonnina joins us to give his reaction. Roma take that Derby result and play a double goose egg draw of their own. Napoli say “hold my prosecco” and play yet another goal-less draw to round out the Top 4. Sampdoria continue to slide against Cagliari. Gattuso gets his first 3 points as Milan’s skipper and OTFR are all kinds of emotional after their 4th disappointing weekend in a row.